Going back to work

I haven't posted in a while because since I went back to work life has been a constant busy period with no breaks. I guess that's how it is once you have a child. Its an ever changing challenge balancing work, daycare and everyday life. A challenge many of us face everyday. We just carry on and keep going.

Two months ago, in June, I went back to work after 6 months of maternity leave. For me, going to back to work was important, not just for the income, but also for the social aspect. Going back to work also meant Archer would learn how to be social with other children, how to be independent and also encourage self learning. 

I've enjoyed being back at work, doing something I have a passion for - and something that doesn't involve nappies, bottles or vomit! I kind of consider work as 'me time'. I've spoken to other working Mum's, and those with young kids have all agreed, being at work is like taking a break. Not to say we don't love our children, we do. But we also need time for us. On the other hand, I have also been judged by many women for saying I am loving being back at work, they respond with shocked faces and a gasp as if I should be grieving being separated from my son. In all honesty, I am loving it, and so is he! He is thriving at daycare and we couldn't be happier with his progress. 

My postnatal depression started when I started to feel so trapped I was scared to leave the house. It was a vicious circle of feeling trapped, so I stayed inside, and then that made the feelings even worse.  Going back to work has forced me to walk out the door and be social. To leave the house and do something that doesn't entirely involve my son. 

Don't get me wrong, it's a daily challenge of dragging myself out of bed, exhausted. Getting dressed (for a fairly corporate job), getting Archer ready and being on the road by 7am to drop him off at daycare. I then spend the day at work, pick him up on my way home. Then its the evening routine and we do it all over again the next day. By the time we reach the weekend I'm shattered beyond words and all I want to do is curl up in bed and go back to sleep. But going to work means errands can only be done on the weekends, so off we go every Saturday morning to swimming class, appointments and getting things done. Before we know its Sunday evening and time for the work week ahead. 

When my therapist told me to do self-care every day I laughed and asked her how could I find time to do that when I barely have time to make dinner in the evenings. She told me I had to do this in order to get better. I know its important, and when I do manage to have a bath I feel great afterwards. Doing it everyday it not something I can possibly keep up with. 

I'm only two month into this balancing work, day-care and everyday life. It's a work in progress that is challenging me both physically and mentally. But at the end of the day, I get to see my boy smile and I also get to enjoy some much needed adult conversation! 

I'm just going to sit here for a moment and enjoy the peace and quiet while I can!

Much love to all the Mums out there - you are doing an amazing job <3 

Mrs R x